Victim Blaming

I've just been reading some stories on the website of my local newspaper. I encountered a story about a woman who was sexually assaulted by a male friend of hers. They were both drunk. She fell asleep and awoke to find his hand down her pants. He's been spared a jail sentence.

That alone worries me, but what worries me even more is the attitude towards sexual assaults and rape. Here is a screenshot of the only comment that was beneath the article:

What worries me EVEN more is that I 'red arrowed' this comment, only for somebody else to clearly like what this numpty has said, knocking it back to a neutral zero. ('Numpty' is a far tamer word than several that are going around in my head right now...)

I agree that whilst drunk you are less responsible for your own actions, and that, is dangerous. But why should women live in fear of getting drunk just in case they're subjected to a horrific sexual assault? You should be able to live your life the way you want without fear of being violated so atrociously. Regardless of the fact that the perpetrator is sorry, he still did it.

How progressive does society have to be before we can eradicate or at least significantly reduce the numbers of crimes like this? Women are not sex objects. We are not there as playthings. We have rights and feelings and the same freedoms as men, so why are so many people blaming victims of rape for their own misfortune? Why not blame the disgusting creatures that commit these crimes? 

Women should be allowed to dress how they like, drink as much as they like, be friends with whoever they like, do whatever they like (within reason... Obviously...) and live their lives with the same freedom that men do. Just because we're different to men doesn't mean to say that we have to be treated as lesser members of society.

Put yourself in the shoes of a rape victim. Imagine how on earth that must feel. To be a victim of such a horrific crime that essentially ruins, or significantly changes your life. Then imagine what it must be like to receive little or no sympathy from others and to be blamed for your own sexual assault... And THEN vilified for a myriad of trivial matters that seemingly caused the perpetrator to single you out for their disgusting act.

From personal experience, I know what it's like to be overpowered by a man. Thankfully, things never went that far, but wires were well and truly crossed and things nearly got out of hand. I was left shaken and fearing any intimacy afterwards. It has had a huge impact on me, yet the man involved probably doesn't even remember it or regard it to be a serious matter. To have a man try and force himself on you is suffocating, it's scary and it's sickening that they see you in that way; as a object to copulate with. Nothing more, nothing less. 

I am aware that this comment is from somebody entirely insignificant with views that I disagree with on a news website. I am also aware that I am an idiot for letting it get to me and writing this blog post in the first place. But I've had enough of misogyny, victim blaming and oppression. 

Why can't we all just get along?

Daily Mail - Women 'To Blame' For Being Raped

The Guardian Says It Far Better Than I Ever Could...

...As Does The Independent 

N.B. Upon checking the aforementioned article again, the comment has now received 12 likes. Ridiculous. 
Who are these people with vile views and why are they allowed to comment on news sites, encouraging other impressionable people to agree with their horrid opinions... Thus causing society to regress to a misogynistic wasteland?

I Did It! I Finally Did It!

Sorry, must apologise in advance, this is not really a Medical-type post.

But... I finally did it! 

Yes, that's right, I rang the police about the atrocious excuse of a human being that lives next door to me and his terrible penchant for drink driving.

I have reported him via Crimestoppers online before, but nothing ever came of that.

He came back at around one this morning. He was literally so drunk that he stalled at the top of his drive. He took a good few seconds to realise why he wasn't going anywhere and then re-started the engine of his increasingly battered pick-up truck. After this, he proceeded to scrape all of the bushes on the side of his drive, before his trademark-drink-drive-move of forgetting to apply the handbrake. Cue lots of rolling down the drive and him displaying his panic-stricken face as he frantically tried to stop himself from crashing into his stationary trailer and garage door. 

That was the final straw for me. I grabbed my phone and after a few deep breaths (I don't know why, but I always get really nervous about phone calls, even to people I know really well...) I dialled the non-emergency number. I got through to a lady and politely asked if I was able to report someone for drink-driving. She said yes, and asked me lots of questions about that numpty from next door. 

Now I knew that there was no chance of him being caught tonight, after all, he was already home. But the lady assured me that they'd got his details and she was sending them to all police stations and officers in the local area so they can keep an eye out for him. She also advised me to ring them again next time he goes out drinking, to help them catch him in the act. 

It won't be long before he's at it again. The last time he did it was at 5am yesterday when he was also evidently 'utterly gazeboed'. 

I really hope they catch him. He's a menace. I know if they do catch him and prosecute him for drink driving, he'll be at risk of losing his licence and therefore his business as a gardener. I feel a little guilty about that, but at the end of the day, I'm not the one breaking the law and putting other road users' lives at risk by being an idiot.

I don't understand why he does it, in all honesty. He never used to. He always got taxis to and from pubs, clubs and women's houses. Recently though, he's just decided he'll chance it. That he'll never get caught I suppose, because at that time in the morning, all of the police officers have their hands full with anti-social behaviour on the streets. He needs to be taught a lesson, that's for sure, and I'll go above and beyond to ensure that he gets it.

Oh, and when he got in, he was talking really loudly, not sure if he was on his phone, but I genuinely had to peer through his front door at about 2am, because he was making groaning noises. (Don't laugh!) I thought he'd drunkenly injured himself, so I went round there with a torch and tried to see if he was on the floor. All I could see was darkness, but he's been quiet ever since. 

Call me what you want, but I couldn't bear it if he ended up killing an innocent person because of this and I'd had this information and never acted upon it. I'd feel guilty. Probably more-so than an irresponsible ignoramus like him.

Sometimes I think life would be a lot easier if people knew their limits.

And obeyed the law.